Friday, January 27, 2012

Not a good day...

I read a blog post recently that said "comparison is the thief of joy". I need to focus on that today as I sit and sulk about my life.

I recently have started an athletic endeavor - I suck, I'm too old and I hurt a freaking lot after every practice. The mind is willing, but the body is weak and old and fat and frumpy and disgruntled!!! It is a cool sport and I am a totally not cool person in that way, soooooo..... Actually what is disappointing, but not really surprising is that I was really hoping I might meet some potential new friends. Not really, they are mostly just weird, not friendly or over the top and annoying. (I'm prolly the problem in this case, I'm sure I'm not being very approachable myself. I tend to do that in new, uncomfortable situations)

I yelled at my kids this morning. I am a shrew! I hear all about these Moms that get to stay home and get to spend time with their kids and do fun motherly type stuff and I round 'em up, head 'em out, yell at them. There is no "this moment" at my house. I wish.

On a diet, starving to death, busting my ass at the gym, not getting anywhere. Very discouraging.

The house is always wrecked. Doesn't matter if it was just picked up and cleaned up an hour before, it's in a perpetual state of wrecked.

I got told I am not a real nurse. Yup, true. Not a real nurse any more. What's the point in what I do??????? Don't know..... Paycheck???? At least I'm not working the night shift. Then I'd be really, really, really bitchy, not just really bitchy.

I need to stop comparing myself to other people. I need to just worry about myself. Make improvements there. Quit feeling sorry for myself. It's just been a hard week, for no particular reason.

I'm prolly just hungry and have PMS.

I'm going to go search for some chocolate and coffee, maybe that will make me feel better.

1 comment:

  1. did you zap this from my mind? i swear i have been thinking these very things about my own life...except for the nurse bit WTF? ps...i wish i was doing as well as you in this athletic are inspiring me to work harder...